The Most Important Thing You Can Do To Help Your Child

TONYO MELENDEZ  Writes:

When we have children, most of us should know, our time is no longer ours. Before marriage and children, one can come and go as one pleases. If we have had a few years living as an adult, at least we have enjoyed our freedom long enough that giving it up for our children, though still a sacrifice, we have given ourselves the opportunity to indulge in life’s magic. When we have children very young, in our teen years, we do not get the chance to discover who we are and what we want from life – we now have to give that time to our kids.

The time for play is, for the most part, over. Some of the magic of our lives is gone. Now come the responsibilities of life. Sometimes we resent having to give so much of ourselves because we had just begun our life and now we must give it to our children. This is one of the most important reasons why it is not a good idea to have children at an age in which we are still learning about ourselves and are not ready to stop our development to take care of the development of our children.  Another reason, and just as important, is economics. We are too young and we have not had time to learn a trade or study at the university to acquire the skills necessary to survive. So, how do we give to our children when we are still taking? It is not easy.

But it must be done. From the moment our children come into the world they take, and we give. It is the way of the world. Our children need us for everything. Like it or not, we start the long parenting trip. Parenting is the most important job in the world, and the most demanding. In a strange way this constant giving is a blessing; it takes us out of our self-involvement and it forces us to become involved with a human being whose life is totally dependent on us. The best parents are the most involved. This means that beyond feeding, clothing, and providing shelter, we must give from our very core and involve ourselves in the duty and the privilege of making our children successful. How do we do that? We involve ourselves daily in their lives. We give them the best of us and we keep on giving. The better parents we are to our children the better the chances that, when their turn comes, they will be involved parents too.

A good parent is involved in his/her children’s friends. Who are they? What are their parents like? What kind of things they like to do? Where are they? What are they doing there? Are they in trouble? Why are they in trouble? How can we avoid trouble? What are they doing in school? Who are their teachers? Are they good teachers for our children? What is the school doing with them? What, if any, are the activities and events the school is having, and should we be part of them? What information we should have regarding their behavior in school? Are they learning at the rate they should? If not, why not? What do we have to do to remedy the situation?

Involvement goes on and on. The best parents are the most involved. It is a high price to pay; giving our lives totally to them, but if we do not do it others might want to get involved with our children that could take them in the wrong direction. So, we must do it! I know it all sounds so difficult. And it is. But it is also the most rewarding way to spend our lives. The best parents raise the best kids. And is it not what we want? Yes! You might find that getting involved in their lives is the most enjoyable thing in the world. Try it. Get involved!

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